Showing posts with label working diary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label working diary. Show all posts

Thursday, September 27, 2018

Reality


I had been staying in my dream for too long,
and now it's time to wake up.

Counting down the days,
I have left 4 more,
and that's it.

Back to life~
back to reality.

No more dreaming,
no more relaxing,
oh, why is reality so harsh?

My life,
my choice,
me, live-in-it.
duhhh

oh well...
okay.

Tuesday, September 11, 2018

任性

一个人的生活中是有很多事情是可以做的。
生活并不完全只是为了赚钱而工作、工作,工作。
打工养家,没错。
忍气吞声为了赚钱,没错。
被压力压得死死的,有钱拿的,用钱换的,没错。

可是!
生活中就只有打工,
每一天把 90% 的时间用在工作上,
其余 10% 留给家人、吃饭冲凉睡觉...
这,健康吗?
呃,开心吗?
这样,还算生活吗?
这样活着,意义在哪?


所以我决定任性一下!
抛开工作~把工作给辞了!
把我的人生调回正常人所需的生活!!
拿回属于我的时间,
我那个应该拿来过活的时间!



任性中的我,
还可以任性多久?

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Decision made. FINALLY!

I quit!
Yes, I did.
Dislike the job, very much.
If you follow my blog, you'll know that.

Actually the decision has been made since April 2013 (the 3rd month of working). But my ego told me not to give up easily, my responsibility told me not to forget them, and so I stay longer to test myself, wanted to know whether this is really what I want, wanted to prove that I am strong and I can do whatever I want to even I don't like what I am doing (trying to be professional DUH!). End up, my ability and attitude plus character speaks louder than my ego and responsibility.
Can you imagine, if every morning, every single day, every time when you woke up, once you open your eyes, you asked yourself: "why do I need to do this again?" "Can I be sick? Can I take MC today?" "What am I doing now..." "Can I not to go work today?" "What is going to happen again later in the office?" "What will I be scolded advised for today?" "Can I not do this any more?" "When can I leave this job?" "Can I go through this again today?"  for months... Do you still feel like getting up? Negative thoughts filled up your mind, every morning, every single day, before you even start your day...? That's pathetic! 

I am not happy with my job. I start to loose self-confident because of this job. I started to hesitate on my stands and believe, doubt myself for nothing, changing my character to the one I used (and now still) to HATE. I am confused. I don't feel anything good that can keep me continue on this job. NOTHING. No satisfaction, no happiness, no interest, no confident, nothing. Why do I need to torture myself in this? I don't like it and I know I am not good in it plus I have no interest in it at ALL, loosing myself and sometimes, I don't even know who am I and what am I doing nor thinking! So, are these reasons strong enough to support me for quitting my job? I guess it's pretty strong though.
So why do I change my job at the first place then? Why leave the job I love and join this? Simple reason, it's just because of exposure~ I want to expose myself to different jobs before I turn 30, before I settle down in the one job that I've chosen to do. Trying new jobs, get experience, learn new things~ that's my reasons of changing job. Every job is the process of learning to me, a stage to learn something new in my life, and I like it. No regrets and never regret on changing jobs.  
What's next then? Honestly, I would like to do some freelance jobs related to my interest. It's not hard to find them, I suppose. In the meantime, take up some courses to improve myself. Yea~ I know what I want now, at least I have a direction on what to do next. Hehe.

Wish me all the best, yo! EeSoon!!!! Go for the things that you want! Go for the things that you like! Go for the dream!! Reality might hold you back a little but, be brave!  Go for dream! Make your dream come true and turn it into reality! You are still young! You can make changes in your life! Live the life you want!! EeSoon, EeSoon, go go go! FIRE up!

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Stupid Mistake

I've done a stupid mistake yesterday.
Not a stupid mistake,
it's a FEW stupid mistakeS.

It's so stupid that I don't understand why was I so blur?
My brain was not function well yesterday.

Hopefully these stupid mistakes 
will NOT be repeated by me in the future.
NOT anymore.



EeSoon, you idiot.

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Satisfaction Search

Did I ever mention that I've change my job?
Well, if I didn't...
I've change my job.

And guess what?
I am not happy with this new job.
Can't find any satisfaction in this job... :(
oh, sad.

I keep on thinking, why do I change my job?
As I always tell others, I want to experience different jobs before I settle down in one.
Yes, it's true! So that's what makes me change my previous job.
Based on my current situation...
I won't stick long in my current job for sure.

I like to learn new things, experience new things
but you know what?
After 3 months of working,
even though I get to learn a lot, experience a lot from the job,
I realize, I don't like this job. 
Really. no. like.
I'm searching very very hard for job satisfaction during my working hours but 
I really can't find any...
I work hard, it has good return,
but I still don't feel any satisfaction.

What to do now?
I'm sort of.. like a walking corpse, living without soul... 
working without passion..
touching without feel...
eating without taste...
hmmm... 

I think you know what am I thinking...
Yea yea, yes, but no, cant.
I can't quit though...
bad for my reputation.. it seems so irresponsible.
I'd just join the company since February, 
it's not even 4 months yet and I am starting to think about resigning...
... nooooooooooooooooooooo ...
no no no, I can't quit... (at least not now)

sigh... sigh... sigh!!!!!!


Tuesday, February 5, 2013

No Feel??

New year, new job!
I quit my previous job, the one who use up my personal time and gives a lot of stress and pressure.. the one who gives me a lot of satisfaction and happiness to me... the one job that I always looking forward to do it everyday, the job that I love it so so much...

There's always a BUT.

So, I am starting a new job this year. New year, new start, new job.
So far I felt very empty... very very empty in my heart... no satisfaction... kind of feeling bored already... and it's only 2 days of work... sigh... and I am already feeling bored. Sad.. I don't feel motivated to do my new work. sigh..

There were some issues between my previous employer and my current employer before I take this new job offer, I am a pretty good employee that do not calculative on doing extra works, I am capable to multi task and I don't mind to do more work. For me, you do more work = you learn more things. Old employer does not willing to let me go and so they blame my new employer for offering the job to me... hmm... funny eh? By the way, my old, new employer and me are all good friends. We are all friends. But because of me... both of them raise up voice to each other... I felt guilty...

Anyway, I left my old job smoothly without any unhappiness, everyone is happy. And I start my new job here at the new environment... hmm.. so far so good, everyone is being nice.

Oh dear... I miss my old job already!!! ... I miss the feeling of mingle around with children.. the pure, naive, clever children. I really do miss my old job... 

No point of thinking about the past. Move forward, EeSoon!!!!! You'd made the decision, now live with it!!!!! All the best, EeSoon!! You'll soon found the FIRE within you (which is currently... 0%) to this new job.

Ahh... All the best to me la... aih.

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Good Morning

Good morning everyone!
It's Tuesday!
Happy Tuesday.

It's time to go work now,
so I say "have a nice day in work" everyone!
Cheers!!

Wow... 
this is the very first time that I write blog post in the morning!
I mean... DAMN early in the morning!
It's 6.50am MAN!!!!

haha..
crap in the morning...
Alright! Got to go now.
Goodbye and have a good day.
Cheers~

Saturday, October 27, 2012

The day!

紧张紧张紧张
紧张紧张紧张
紧张紧张紧张紧张
紧张紧张紧张紧张紧张



再多几个小时,
就那么几个小时,
要来临了... 要来临了... 
快到了!!!!!


紧张紧张紧张
紧张紧张紧张
紧张紧张紧张紧张
紧张紧张紧张紧张紧张


第一次当主持人,
主持毕业典礼...
哇!啊啊啊啊!
紧张紧张紧张..
紧张紧张紧张紧张紧张...



EeSoon加油!!!
你可以的!!!!!!
镇定!!!!!
be cool~~


...





...





PLEASE, 
STAY CALM.


...



!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, October 18, 2012

工... 活

忙、盲、莽,

赶、敢、感...

累、累、泪。


乐~~~~唷!!

---休息去---

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Time Management

There's only one word to describe EeSoon's time management.
One word explains all.
And the particular word is ---- BAD.


EeSoon's time management = BAD.


How can I improve my time management skill?
Is it really that bad?
Is it really because I am lousy on managing time?
OR I am just refusing/ rejecting/ to manage it?
... afraid to make changes in my life maybe?



Hmm... this is something I need to think deeply.
(only when I am free to think about it~ Haaaaha.)

gonna continue my works now.
ciao~

Monday, October 1, 2012

Neglect

I think... I've neglect "something"... unconsciously...
hmmm... I've really neglect that... "thing".



I've put too much time doing another thing, 
end up neglecting this quite important "thinggie".

Not good yo!! ... not good.



Now that I notice it,
I should pay more attention on this "thing"... right?
Hmm. Put more concentration on ...
this "something" is what I should do now..
alright then!


So... I guess, I got to go and do my "thing" after this.
I wish I can finish that "thing" some day... one day.. 

Goodnight everyone.
Wish me luck!

Thursday, July 5, 2012

罪恶感

没有在周末工作,让我觉得有罪恶感。


...



??



我竟然会因为周末没有在家工作而产生罪恶感!!???
啊?? 什么和什么???
周末不就是拿来休息,拿来放松自己的吗?
怎么放松了几个周末后...
莫名的罪恶感渐渐地涌现...?
什么嘛?什么来的???
为什么听起来那么奇怪?
我的生活到底怎么了??
怎么连让自己休息都会感到有错?
我到底怎么了?
难道...周末时不做工,是错的吗?
有不对咩??
周末用来休息,有错咩?
我总觉得自己做错了什么...
总在放松、休息的当儿觉得自己在做着坏事...
感觉自己好像不应该那么轻松...
轻松是罪?
到底怎么了?
为什么连休息,都深感压力?
Why?
Why... oh why?


Saturday, April 28, 2012

Decision

Decision has to be made soon.
I have to decide what I want!!
There's no more yearsss to be wasted... so...

EeSoon, you know what I mean... 
Planning is necessary and so does following the plan.
EeSoon...
What's your final decision?


EeSoon: hmmm .... mmm...

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

灵感灵感

灵感来了,
我要捉住它!
千万不可让它逃跑、
不可让它离开我!!
不!!!


灵感灵感~~~
来来来~~~
我很需要你~~
你应该知道我是多么的想念你~~~
多么的爱你~~~


哦~
我可爱的灵感~~
我的灵感~~


别走!!!!!!

Friday, March 23, 2012

日夜颠倒~


傍晚六时睡觉去~
凌晨一时起床来~
日夜颠倒原因何在?


日夜赶工,
身心疲累,
精神折磨,
压力重重,
请问..何苦?


诉苦完毕,
继续打拼!
加油加油...



Saturday, February 11, 2012

消沉星期六

为什么我的工作总是做不完???
我很肯定不是时间管理的问题了,
我的时间已经管理得很妥当了!
连周末都留在家赶工,
为什么我的工作还是做不完???
为什么????
我被工作压到快喘不过气了...
好苦啊...
钱难赚啊...


我好想...
转行...
可以吗?


我要找一份放工时间到后,
就不用再做/想公事的工作。
放工后就真的是真正的放工!
不用想工作事、不用把工作带回家,
放工后就完完全全与公事隔离,
周末时拥有自己的私人时间,
完全不需要在家赶工。
哇...真的好想好想这样...好想要...
有这样的工作吗?


慢慢的...
我对我现在的工作...
开始产生了厌倦感...厌烦...
我觉得很无奈...
有时候觉得很烦...
无形的压力常常出现...
每一天都在赶工赶工,
再怎么努力、加油,
工作还是没完没了...


虽说我的热忱还在,
我还是很爱我的工作,
能撑那么久,全因为我喜欢它。
可是...我累了...
人,是会累的。
机器也需要休息...
EeSoon不是机器...


我...可以换工吗...?

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

1st Day of Work

Yesterday I start my work since 9am
and
stop my work at 6am this morning.
then
accidentally fell asleep.

when I woke up,
it was 7.30am.
I was asked... or more accurate,
was demanded/command to reach work place by 7.45am.
But, I reach there at 7.59am

hmm...
hmm.

Then, I continue work since 8.05am this morning
until
about 1 hour ago,
which is...
3.50pm??

conclusion?

I am tired,
exhausted,
fatigue,
my heavy works have finally, officially, started.
yeaaaeehh~

Happy working days everyone here~!!
Enjoy your work!!
You don't need to LOVE it to feel enjoyment,
just don't HATE it,
everything will be fine and smooth.
All the best!

zz

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Pile

a pile and a pile and a pile...
pile up!
pile pile pilesss....


My work is getting more and more and more...
pile up and up and up...
each and everyday it increase by itself...
till when I can clear it?
hmm...
?


If I start doing it now,
will it be cleared by tomorrow?
If I start doing 1 hour later,
can I cleared it in few hours before tomorrow comes?

If... I...
if if if...
why not just start the damn work now,
EeSoon you lazy bug???


erm erm erm...
hmm... mmm...
hehe.


better go now before the angel and devil in me start war.
shoo! EeSoon, shoo!!


work hard, EeSoon!!
Go!!!!

Saturday, October 1, 2011

YEsshhh!!!

15 down, 5 more to go~~
yuhoooo~~~~
happy me happy me happy me!!!

oh wait...
no...
not 5...
it's 6...
no no,
it's 8...
... ...


I still have about 5 stacks
and another 3 extra works to be done.
works...
sigh...


Go EeSoon!
GO!!!

bye.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

20 stacks

I am dead...
Being lazy for days and this is what I get,
20 stacks of works to do...
20 stacks!!!!!!!!!
oh hell...

(and there are more to come)

I don't want to be alive then..
Let me be dead.
aiyoyo...
why EeSoon so lazy?
where is her motivation??
ish ish ishhhhh!

Go work la!!!
still blogging here???
no wonder have 20 stacks!!
Shooo, EeSoon, shoooo!!!!!!!
...
...

schizophrenia?

...
...